Author Confessions – I Don’t Own A Dog

Group of twelve dogs sitting in front of a white background

That’s right. I don’t own a dog.

Yes, you read that statement correctly, but don’t look at me like I kicked your puppy. I have owned and cared for several dogs in my lifetime. I just don’t have one right now.

Dogs are great and I am definitely a dog person. However, there are many good reasons… okay maybe good is a stretch… but there are many reasons I don’t have a dog.

  • Reason #1 – I visit friends and family who have plenty of them and get all the fixes I need. I share dog care concerns with loved ones who have pets.
  • Reason #2 – My author life is too crazy for a dog. I go to coffee shops and sometimes I stay for six hours with the rest of the world forgotten while I write. I’ve barely managed to train my husband to take care of himself.
  • Reason #3 – I feel like I just got my kids out of the house. The idea of someone needing food on a set schedule disturbs me greatly, not to mention having to worry about yet another creature’s pooping habits. Well, I’m just saying that’s highly time-consuming … and I have grandchildren whose parents are going through that now.
  • Reason #4 – I’m having a go at learning to be a tad more selfish. There are only a few people I will allow to affect my writing schedule, excluding 2015 family crises.

German Shepherd puppies, six weeks old

If it makes you forgive me any quicker, one day I will get a dog again. When my incessant need to frequently walk on strange ground (aka travel) is behind me and my need to stay home prevails more, then I will get a dog.

Or maybe I might even get a puppy if I can find it in myself to care about pooping habits again. They are awfully cute for a few months… until the shoe chewing phase begins. My son has two dogs. I have bought many chew toys, large ropes, and synthetic bones for my grand-dogs. I’ve bought stuffed animals whose deaths are still with me. Nothing saved my daughter-in-law’s shoe collection from those two.

Cat people will probably ask… why not a cat? They like to point out how cats take care of themselves. Oh, I’ve had cats in my house before too. But if I ever get another cat, it will have to be the world’s most special cat because all domestic felines are like tiny lions to me. I am not fooled by their domesticity one little bit. Long ago, I learned to see beyond their cute fluffiness and purring. I see the vicious killer they’re hiding inside those cute, purring bodies.

When you let a cat into your life, you can go to sleep in a warm toasty bed with clean sheets and wake up to a dead–but still bleeding–mouse next to your face on the pillow. Your innocently blinking faux lion will merely wince at your screaming over it. If you persist in trying to hold them accountable, they will pounce off the bed to go lick themselves to bliss while you deal with disposing of the dead body. I know the fresh hell of what I speak. You can’t make a deal with a cat not to do such things. They will do as they damn well please. I have loved one cat in my lifetime and that my friends was enough.

Dogs can be reasoned with for the most part and I like that quality in the creatures I share living space with. A good dog will even shake on things if you offer incentives. A bit of a long run, a nice belly rub, a little kibble, and they’re pretty set. Yep… I’m definitely getting a dog again one day. I just have another 50 or so books to write first. Check back with me once I hit a hundred published titles. It might be time then.

German Shepherd Dog sat giving paw

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About Author Confessions

Being an introvert is hard. I find it especially challenging when trying to reach out to readers more. Social media is the worst nightmare for an introvert like me. From my perspective, it often seems like writers are  being prompted on social media to share some of the dirty secrets of their lives.

But I don’t really have any dirty secrets… at least not that I’m aware of anyway… not the kind I figure most would find interesting. I don’t mind my readers knowing more about me personally though, so I have come up a blogging category called “author confessions” where I will try to share a bit more about what makes me tick… for those who might be interested.

This is the first article of that sort. Hope you enjoyed it. It may take a while for me to come up with another. Thought I would just get the worst thing I could think of over with first.  No hate mail please – LOL. I swear I am an animal lover. All comments to this post are welcome, no matter what kind of animal you own.

7 Comments

  1. Right now I own 4 dogs, 9 cats, 1 parakeet and a fish tank. I can’t imagine not having animals but all 4 of my dogs are elderly so I could see me taking a short break from dogs as they pass. I didn’t set out to have 9 cats but living in the country we end up rescuing them. Luckily they all but one stay outside.
    I’m enjoying these posts were much.
    Ps I loved that you just got Bruce trained I bet that too a while lol

    Reply
    • LOL. Glad you are liking the posts, Karen.

      Reply
  2. I, too, am a dog lover who doesn’t own a dog. We simply don’t live a lifestyle conducive to caring properly for a dog. We do have 2 indoor cats who amuse us and whom we adore. I can’t imagine my house without an animal friend. So we enjoy our feline companions and live for the day when our newlywed daughter gives us a grand puppy to love. I kind of like that our 19 pound creams idle cat stalks around our house like a panther and it cracks us up that they bring us all their stuffed mice as tokens to induce us to feed them. Give cats another try. Two cats is better than one, though. Thanks for sharing your world with us and can’t wait for the next installment in whichever fictional world you have to offer.

    Reply
    • That was Creamsicle cat. I hate autocorrect.

      Reply
    • Two cats? I thought you liked me. LOL Just kidding. Both daughters grew up to become cat people. I think stuffed mice would be much better than real ones. It was a Calico that brought the mice… and baby snakes… and just about anything else you can imagine. She was great cat and an interesting one. But she was enough for me. Will keep an open mind though 🙂

      Reply
  3. I also do not have a dog. I would love one but because of my travel schedule it would not be fair to the dog. I am lucky that I have a friend whom I dogsit for when she goes out of town. I also enjoy the dogs that my family own,
    Thanks for the confession! I’m looking forward to reading more,

    Reply
    • LOL You’re welcome 🙂

      Reply

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